Wednesday, October 29, 2008

The Impossible Task of Measuring Up

I'm a bit of a blog snoop. Instead of folding laundry, or washing dishes or picking up the aftermath of babies at play I will read a blog and click on a link to another blog within the post of an interesting looking blog on a side bar. I can meander for endless lengths of time reading other people's blogs sometimes just passing through, others I stop and "sit a spell." (I have no idea why that phrase popped into my head. Some of those really Southern blogs must have planted a seed somewhere.) Sometimes I'll stumble upon a blog I enjoyed, forget to bookmark it and then have no idea how I got to it consequently loosing it, temporarily at least.

But there's a danger to reading some of those blogs, for me anyway, and from some of your comments, for some of you as well. While some blogs are about people just struggling through life, like the rest of us, some blogs are about families who seem so perfect. The pictures, the impossible menus, the photos of uncluttered floors and uncluttered kitchen counters, I find myself comparing my life to the glimpse of a life I see on my computer screen and I fall desperately short. And being the comparer that I am, I feel unworthy. Unworthy of what? I have no idea really. My children, my life, I really don't know, its a deep seated feeling that buries itself deep only to bubble up from time to time perhaps from years of insecurities.

The bottom life is that this is my life. Its not impossibly sweet and definitely not impossibly perfect! I can only imagine Trace and Ross' reactions if I churned out gourmet dinners along with tulle table clothes and floral bouquets on a regular basis. We won't even mention the younger children's reaction to the proposed menu. I freely admit that I could spend less time on my laptop and more time on my housework but perhaps the real key is more balance.

There will always be someone smarter than me, funnier than me, prettier than me, skinnier than me and some most of things I don't have to look very far to find! The lesson I work on and will probably forever work on is to accept who I am, who my family is, what my life is and change what needs to be changed but embrace the rest. The perfect people can live their own perfect lives. But something tells me that the "perfect people" aren't so perfect after all.


Lorie said...

Right there with you Denise, I know what you mean. I can't imagine that those perfect people are having as much fun as we are. :o)

Denise said...

Yeah, especially you now that you're getting some sleep!!! Yea for baby crib nets!

Crystal said...

Great post, Denise. I know I feel that way sometimes and I am sure your other readers do as well.

Mom 2 Four said...

Wow, you said exactly how I feel when lurking around on others blogs. My house is a mess, laundry everywhere and I feel like a bad mommy sometimes. But I know my kids love me, at least the little ones anyway. The teenagers are a whole different ball game.

I want to live in magazine world where everything is perfect. Dare to dream. LOL

Denise said...

Christe, the teenagers DO love you-- their just too busy being teenagers to think of anyone else but themselves. Give them a couple years and they'll probably come around.

The Johnson 5 said...

Our kids don't care if our houses are clean, they love us messy houses and all!!
It is all about balance.
I LOVE to cook, so my dinner menu's are pretty good.
I make it a point to start with enough time to get child number 1 fed and then child number 2 and then last but not least child number 3 and then dropped off at one of the numerous activties that evening.
The rest of the house is a mess but at least everyone has a full belly :):)

The glass is always half full RIGHT?

The Sharp Family said...

Amen sister.

Kristin said...

A girl after my own heart. I can't tell you how many hours I have spent reading other blogs, surfing through other people's sites, all while letting my house go to pot. Yes, I could have been cleaning or folding laundry. Heck, when Dave was recently in China, I was very happy finding clean clothes in my laundry basket instead of my drawers. Well, not very happy but too lazy to fold them.

Well, anyone who has been to my blog knows my life is pretty typical. Obnoxious teens, loud preschoolers, traveling husband, sports, don't like cooking (but I'll try and improve), and other such normal things.

I am no Martha Stewart, I have no nanny, I drive paid for cars, and I shop at Wal-Mart. My life is not thrilling to the outside world but precious to me--even when I really complain. :-)

So I totally understand!

Mom 2 six said...

There are days I hope that my posted pictures are not fully enlarged !

Kristy said...

Very well said!!!! Nobody is perfect !! Good gosh I put a picture of my 45 year old drunk driving, rolled her truck, broke her neck and sternum, and cut her head open sister on my blog!!!! So don't compare yourself to anyone ever again, we are all God's creation and he created us in his image, so love yourself just the way your Denise, from my view you are pretty darn close to PERFECT!!!!

Love and Blessings, Kristy

Jenn said...

Would it interest you to know that several people (real-life friends as well as blog-friends) have clicked from my blog to yours and mentioned to me how absolutely amazing you are? You are a very popular blog-mom... at least among people I know. (And for the record, I think you are amazing too!)You are quite the bloggy role model for me.