They say that curiosity kills the cat but apparently it causes other trouble too.
It started innocently enough. One day Julia and I were watching a Bravo marathon of Project Runway and there were a zillion commercials for singles online dating services and it caught my attention. I've been single for three years. Now I admit, saying that I'm single seems really weird to me but saying I'm a widow seems even worse. Little old women in a rocking chairs knitting comes to mind with the term widow and the only rocking I seem to get in is when we're having rockin' dance parties.
Sometimes I think I'm ready to think about dating, other days I'm not so sure. But I'll be honest. My chances of meeting someone are slim to none. I've heard of some women picking up guys in the produce aisle at the grocery store, but nothing is more attractive to a guy than a screaming toddler trying to escape from the cart and snot smeared across my black long sleeved T-shirt. While some people might think that's endearing, those people would be women.
Plus, who's available after 40? My guess is that the pickin's are slim. In your 20's you can guess that a lot of guys are available. After 40 it's safer to assume they're taken. So what's a girl to do? Out of pure curiosity, last week I signed onto eHarmony, just to see what kind of guys were out there. My luck, it would be a bunch of trailer trash guys looking for a woman to cook their catch from their latest fishing trip. No thank you. After filling out like a zillion questions I was given a list of 5 guys. Most were in their 40's and most seemed to be professionals with kids. No pictures were available unless I became a member. I thought "Well, I guess when I'm ready, there actually might be some decent guys out there." At this point it was all entirely free and I was given the opportunity to "join," which I choose not to do. So that was that.
Or so I thought.
The next day in my email inbox I received 5 new matches. I was now matched with 10 guys. I also got an email telling me that "Richard" requested communication with me. Say what? You mean they could see me? Uh oh! I ignored it.
The third day I received 5 new matches and 7 additional guys requesting communication. I now officially had more men then kids, a real phenomenon. I could hardly handle one guy, what I am supposed to do with eight? I was beginning to feel like I was on my own Bachelorette show. I've got 8 guys interested and I get to pick. Do you think Chris Harrison will show up and pay for any dates?
Eight guys. That's more than days of the week. How does that work? One every night and a matinee on Sunday? Makes me tired just thinking about it.
At this point I signed onto eHarmony to check out the cost. I haven't even seen what these guys look like and although I can communicate with them, I'd really like to see them first. Seems pretty superficial, I know, but nevertheless....
But I'm really torn. I'm not sure what to do. Am I ready for a seventh child? No, but I might be ready for a male friend. I know I'm not ready for marriage. I'm finally used to being on my own and being in charge. I'm not quite ready to hand over those reins to someone. I also admit that its all pretty scary. Dating, at my age. Really??? And more importantly, what man is going to want to date me when he finds out that I have SIX kids??? When would I find time for these dates? How do I choose?
So, I'm turning to you all for wisdom and advice. What do you think I should do? I would love to meet someone the old fashioned way, but does that way even happen anymore? Maybe I should just get a hobby instead, like macrame. Anybody need a hanging plant holder?
1 month ago