Tuesday, April 28, 2009

There's Always Room For TWO More

You read that correctly and this time I'm not talking about dogs. Meet the two newest members of our family:

Trace's girlfriend Cody and her sweet little boy Gauge.

Cody and Gauge just moved here on Sunday from South Carolina. They are currently staying with us until Cody gets a job and they find a place to live, not that we mind having them here. (Cody is SO helpful that I'm not sure I want her to move out!) And for those of you who are like me and not strong in math skills, there are currently 9 people living here. While we now have almost as many people as Jon and Kate Plus 8, we still aren't anywhere near the Duggars. Yet.

They arrived on Sunday afternoon and after 2 days of driving they immediately headed for the back yard. Gauge, being a 3 year old boy cooped up in a car so long, needed to play. Notice, however, that my children are hogging the swings.

Ryan is loving have a built in friend although he's not too sure about sharing Trace with Gauge. Emma, being Emma, just does her own thing. Of course, being the opportunist that I am, I'm thinking there might be some potential blog posts out of all this this. I didn't have to wait very long.

Last night I was giving Ryan, Jenna and Emma a bath so Gauge joined in the fun. Gauge is potty trained (here's hoping that Gauge is a positive influence!!!) so when it came time to get in the tub he was just wearing shorts. In one fell swoop he had both his shorts and his boxers off. There stood Gauge, totally naked, waiting to get in the tub.

Ryan had been taking off his clothes and turned to look at Gauge. Ryan's eyes got wide with surprise and he pointed to Gauge's private area and began to squeal with excitement. Now a male can respond to this in a several ways. One is to be proud to have caught the attention and obvious appreciation for his male appendage. Or, the male could be like Gauge, completely caught off guard by the turn of events, semi freaked out and run and hide behind his mother's leg. In the meantime, obviously missing some very important social cues, Ryan continued to express his glee.

At that moment I realized that my son had limited access to views of the male anatomy. Poor boy is surrounded by girls and probably thought he was deformed. I can only imagine how happy he was to see someone who looked like him.

I got Ryan completely undressed and away from Gauge. Gauge, in the meantime, had relaxed a bit and had moved away from his mother's leg. However, Ryan's excitement could not be so easily dampened. Once Ryan was stripped, he arched his back and with both hands began pointing enthusiastically to his male parts, trying to show Gauge that he looked just like him. Ryan then proceeded to walk towards Gauge with the apparent intention of having their parts touch.

I quickly began to wonder if this had been a good idea after all. My son was becoming a pervert. Officer Ryan was going to have to arrest himself of indecent exposure and lewd behavior. I snatched him before there was actual contact and tried to communicate to him that he needed to keep that part to himself. Let's just hope he remembers our little chat in about 13 years.



PS> The actual bath with off with further incidents.

37 comments:

JD said...

ROTFLMBO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That is priceless!!!

Goosegirl said...

I laughed out loud!! Hilarious!!!

Sivje

Christina said...

Note to self: Don't read Denise's post while Daddy is sleeping beside me.

I busted out laughing and woke him up. Absolutely hilarious.

Carey-Life in the Carpool Lane said...

Too, too funny! Hurray for Ryan finally realizing there are others like him (male) out there!

joanna and scott said...

OK, that's hysterical!!! I can just picture Ryan, made me laugh so hard I cried!!

Lindsey's mom said...

That is to funny!!!

Dan River Mama said...

That is so funny!

Tammy Howard said...

There's a penis envy joke in her somewhere and I just can't find it...

TOO funny!!!

Congrats on the new additions!

Sandy Toes said...

What a full house but full of fun and love.
sandy toe

Sarah said...

LOL!

Kim said...

LOL! Welcome to the newest members of your family!

Mary said...

ROTFL! Oh.my.gosh! I almost spit my coffee out all over my keyboard! That is a RIOT!

Brandy said...

ROFLMAO!!! That is too much...he was SOOOO excited. Poor kid thought he was a freak of nature till that point.

Jules said...

Hilarious! What goes through their little minds . . . .

Sassypants Wifey said...

Oh my gosh! I totally had to read that to my husband who replied with "I am glad we have girls, but maybe twin boys should be next on the list" bahahaha. Guess he doesnt want any future boys to be confused. What a cutie Ryan is. Good for him to be so welcoming though. I bet it is tough to have a new guy around.

Jill said...

Well, Cody and Gauge are BOTH ADORABLE! What fun to have them...and I am happy for Officer Ryan and the addition of another Male to the household!

Crystal said...

This is hilarious! Maybe my favorite post of all time!

April said...

omg, how fun! i love guests :-)

Angel said...

oh Denise, too funny! Ain't kids grand?

The Royal Family said...

That was a great story!!!!!!!! Thanks for sharing!

Anonymous said...

you'll have to retell that story when they are teens!!! roflmao!!!

toooooooo funny I can imagine him squeeling lol

Kathleen

The Gotch 5 said...

Thank you so much for the hilarious story!!! I laughed out loud but so needed a good laugh after a long day at work!!!!!

The Gotch 5 said...

Ok I just read your comments and am now going to prove I am not cool. What does roflmao stand for!??

Denise said...

Uh, no, you're just proving you haven't hung out in chat rooms. LOL ROFLMAO means Rolling On (the) Floor Laughing My Ass Off.

And who says you can't learn anything from reading my blog????

Kristin said...

That is hysterical!! Poor Ryan, he probably did wonder about himself! So glad he has another boy to hang with----as long as they keep their clothes on!

Jules said...

Hopefully-Chris Hansen won't be visiting your house anytime soon . . .

"FINE"al thoughts... said...

What a funny post! My son is the only boy with four sisters and I imagine he would react the same way!

Anita said...

OH my lord, this is just too funny! My husband tells a story of his niece and nephew when they were very young, my nephew noticed that his sister did not have the same parts as he did, and she being all of 4 told him not to worry, his would fall off when he got like her!!! Poor kid was probably hanging on to his penis for dear life!

I have an award for you............going up Thursday morning! You have given me so much support and kindness, thanks always, and you told me all about SITS, and I've had more fun and wider readership since that advice!
Have a great day, and maybe if you keep inviting folks in you can be as big as the Duggars, but never as crazy...LOL.

Carey-Life in the Carpool Lane said...

Hey Denise,
I've got a 'green' award for you at my place. The code is at the very bottom of the post...
-Carey

Geeta said...

The adventures of your family never cease to amaze and amuse me. Perhaps your family SHOULD be the next Duggers!

Kristin said...

That is hilarious Denise!
I can't wait to see all the funny stuff that the 9 of you come up with in weeks to come!

Ronnica said...

I'm laughing at your conjecture of what must have been going on in Ryan's head!

~Issy said...

I haven't laughed this hard in a very long time! :D

Rocksee said...

Ohhh my.. ! Denise you never fail to give me the giggles!

Party of Seven said...

Thanks for the laugh, that is way too funny and needed that!!

Megan said...

Oh my gosh! LMAO! SO funny!!!

Dorie said...

LOL I love that comment about Chris Hanson visiting your blog. Oh boy! :) Let's just hope not!! LOL