Kick in the Pants

I've been a bit quiet this week and I'm sorry for that. I've been in a bit of funk. I do this sometimes and I have to pull myself out of it. It usually only lasts a few days but unfortunately it's lasted all week.

Like so many people right now, I'm dealing with financial issues and it's got my head spinning. I'm trying to tighten everything I can but it just doesn't seem to be enough. And so I worry, which is the total opposite of what I should be doing.

God doesn't want us to worry, in fact in Matthew 6:25-34 tells us not to worry. Matthew writes that Jesus tells us that God takes care of the birds and clothes the lilies, aren't we so much more valuable? He calls those of us who worry "O you of little faith." And he's so right. If I trusted God, I wouldn't worry. I love the summation at the end, verses 33-34:

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

I got a kick in the pants this morning. I wish I could tell you that I came to the above realization on my own, but I didn't. It took the words of a mother with 10 children, a woman dieing of cancer who wrote of finding joy in the moment. Cindy shames me, as she justly should. She is trying to learn how to live her life in the moment, not looking too far down the road into the future. Shouldn't we all be living like that? I, of all people, should know that there are no guarantees in this life. It could all be gone tomorrow.

Almost 3 years ago today, I was facing a bleak future. No matter how I looked at it, my life and the lives of my children would never be the same. Either Darrell lived, and we faced bankruptcy, the loss of our home and everything we owned, or he died. I chose the former. I took it straight on, was already looking at filing bankruptcy on my own, hoping to spare Darrell the trauma of it all when he finally was aware of his surroundings. And I wasn't worried. How can that be? What I was facing 3 years ago was so much worse than what I'm facing now.

I think worry is actually a symptom. Its a sign that my relationship with God is not what is should be. When we're faced with trauma, its easy to turn to God. We know things are out of our hands. But when times are better, we start to slack off. Years ago, I taught 5-6th grade Sunday school and we were studying Moses and the Israelites flight from Egypt. My kids couldn't understand how the Israelites could see the miracles of God and still not trust and obey later. I shared the class's amazement but I realize that I'm no differnt than those forgetful Israelites. Complacency will get you in the end.

I encourage you to visit the blog Faithful Promises and leave Cindy a comment. Her faith may be strong but its still nice to know others are praying for you. And I encourage you to evaluate your own trust in God. Do you need a kick in the pants like I did?