Thursday, January 29, 2009

Life Lesson Thursday

(This is the 5th post in a series of themed posts. Be sure to drop by tomorrow for a VERY special post!}

As parents we want to impart wisdom onto our children. We wish to take our life experiences and pass on the lessons we have learned. Those ungrateful urchins often don't listen, but we try anyway. Its human nature for us to try, the circle of life...

Sorry, for a moment I heard African drums and had the strangest desire to lift one of my children into the air and hold them over a cliff.

Anyway, as I was saying, we want to give our children life lessons. Lessons for living life, rules about what not to do and rules about what we should do. We've all heard that the most basic rules of life are really learned in kindergarten and there's really no arguing with that. Those rules are pretty great. But there's some that just don't seem to be covered in any classroom and its up to us, loving parents, to pass these pearls of wisdom on. Today's the day to start.

Today's Thursday life lesson is about hats.

What the...? you're asking. I'm sorry. That was covered yesterday in What the...? Wednesday, but if you scroll down you'll find that post below.

Think about it. Who really teaches us about hats? As I pondered the mystical topic of hats I was overwhelmed with everything that I could teach my children. Unfortunately, they seem to have short attention spans so I'll have to keep it to the really important stuff.

My precious, darling children, (remember this is for my children, but feel free to eavesdrop)

I wish to pass onto you the wisdom pertaining to hats. Far too many people just whip a hat on their head without even giving it a second thought. But cherished cherubs, hats are more than a mere accessory and must be regarded with careful thought and consideration.

{Who doesn't call their children Cherished Cherubs???}

First, a hat can be your most helpful aid.

Yikes!!!

This is a perfect example. Can you believe that your next to perfect mother would actually go out in public looking like this? But what's a person to do, out in the world without a hair brush? Silly heads, she has a plan. She may not brush her hair, but she has a plan to cover up her dirty little secret. What's her plan?

A hat, silly! Hats can make everything better. Feeling sad? Put on hat. Feeling lonely? Put on a hat. Feeling upset that you missed most of LOST because of cranky, whiny sick kids? Sorry, no hat's gonna fix that. Glass of wine and a DVR, maybe, but not a hat.

So hats are not a cure all, fix all for everything. But here's something else you should know young padawan: They can actually cause you harm.

{Note the cool Star Wars reference, alluding and comparing the wearing of hats to The Force. It also carries a bit of foreshadowing: we're headed to the Dark Side.}

You put on a hat and look so cute and stylish. But think girl! Think boy! Think before you behat yourself. Hats are not to be worn lightly. Wearing hats can have drastic consequences.

Ahh! Look away! Yes, its true, a dastardly case of hat hair.

Young innocents, wearing fleece hats in the dead of winter. Sure those hats keep your heads warm but what happens when you take them off?

Crazy hair! That's what happens!

Think of wearing a hat like entering a lifelong relationship with your significant other. Wearing a hat is a commitment. Once you put that hat on, you're pretty much stuck with it. No turning back unless you happen to have a bottle of detangling spray {or a really good prenup}.

And that mon petit chou {'my little cabbages' in French, a by product of 8th grade French class} is my lesson on hats. I can see that your minds have begun to wander. Perhaps if you were wearing a hat, your wee little brains would be held more firmly in place.

Until our next lesson, the evils of eavesdropping, remember that I love you!

Mommy

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Be sure to check out Brandy's Life Lesson Thursday at her blog I'm Not Your Average Soccer Mom. I love that she's playing along!

Yesterday Kristin at The Way It Is and Carey at Life In the Carpool Lane decided to join in the fun of What the...? Wednesday. If you want to join in today's fun let me know and I'll link you here! Email me at dms052564@gmail.com when your post is up.

I tried to do a Mr. Linky for this, but would you believe I'm completely original and there wasn't a title for Life Lesson Thursday? And to top it all off, I had to PAY money to up grade to create my own (I have no idea how much) Frankly, I'd rather keep the money for things like GIVEAWAYS so I'll just enter them here the old fashioned way.

Other Blogs joining in Life Lesson Thursday:

Brandy at I'm Not Your Average Soccer Mom- lessons learned from Reality TV
Anita at A Wife, A Woman and a Mom-- lessons learned from telling jokes!

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

OMG-good lesson! LOVE the before/after pics!

mommy4life said...

Where's my hat?

Erika said...

First two pics? Hil.ar.ious. !!! The rest of them were just spot on!

Brandy said...

LOL! This is sooo much fun. The real lesson I learned from eavesdropping -

Carry a comb with you at ALL times!

Denise said...

Can I just say that I hate hats!! Probably because of the hair issue~

Denise Grover Swank said...

See Denise, someone probably actually took the time to explain to you the perils of hats.

I wonder if they make Hallmark cards for this?

The Johnson 5 said...

You look cute in a hat. Me on the other hand, I look like my 13 year old son :)

You CRACK me up!!

Unknown said...

oh so funny!! Sure I'll play, I have a story that is so apropo to life lessons........one my wee son had to learn recently. I'll mention your blog in mine.
You are so much fun to read!

Shell in your Pocket said...

Great post!

I chuckled with the part about lifting them over the cliff..you are so funny! Humor makes each day a little easier!
-sandy toe

Kim said...

You always give me a great laugh to start the day off! You're too funny!!

Just for the record I hate hats on me. The last time a wore a hat I was in China sightseeing in freezing temps (2 years ago)! I purchased one off the street from a vendor. My husband couldn't believe it. He know's I don't wear hats no matter what. I figured these people didn't know who I was and would never see me again.

Kristin said...

I just love your blog, Denise!
It's always so funny!
I don't think I've ever worn a hat, unless I had to for some specific reason! Here in Texas, it's just too hot to wear hats!

Aspiemom said...

You are crazy! Great pics!

momma said...

i would like to know how to teach a child/spouse how to GIVE up a hat. my hubby has 30 hats(all the same sports team) and he constantly needs a new one. now he is passing that lesson on to our son!!!

Kristin said...

Thank you for making my lunch break more fun! My favorite so far has been Wednesday. Love that Emma!!

Kelsey said...

I don't think I've worn a hat in the last 10 years. No wait, I take that back, I was in the snow sometime 5 years ago.
Listen to your mom kids, she's full of advice!

Vickie said...

The pictures are so cute. The first one cracked me up! I love baby hat hair. There are times, I am walking my kid to school and I should be wearing a hat. I just roll out of bed, get her ready and take her to school. Yup, the hat would hide the bedhead.